Dear US Men's National Team

Alright guys, are you guys all listening? You've had yourselves one crazy summer so far and now that its coming to an end, I'd thought you'd like to hear how a bunch of drunk punk rockers from Albuquerque feel about it. You beat Mexico, lost to Costa Rica, and then had to come back against Honduras before we all took a trip to South Africa.

Holy shit, right? I thought you guys stood a good chance against Italy in the first half before everything broke down at the beginning of the second half. (BTW, FUCK YOU, Giuseppe Rossi! You were born in America, asshole. DPD has you marked as a dead man.) But that game against Brazil, dudes. Ouch. Its excusable to lose 3-0 to Brazil, but you have to go out and try to win the game. DaMarcus Beasley, you done fucked up. Here, lets watch how you gift Brazil on their second goal.



You're too old now, man. Make room for better, younger players.

Then came the 3 best games I have see the US Team play since the 2002 World Cup. You beat the pants off of an Egypt team that had been on a roll. I mean, the beat Italy the game before. Fuck! Great job! Then you upset the top team in the world. Spain hadn't lost in 35 games. That includes victories over Germany in the Euro 2008 Final. Shit yeah! Awesome, bra! You guys worked your ass off to get us to the first FIFA Final the US Mens team has ever been in. EVER. Sick. If we lived anywhere else, we'd of all flipped cars and burned everything down in celebration. As it was, we had to deal with that dipshit Jim Rome talking about how no one cares. Death to America.

In that final rematch, you guys made DPD proud. It was heartbreaking to see that final Goal by Lucio. And Clint Dempsey, we all teared up with you as you accepted the Bronze Boat for being the 3rd best player in the Tourny. You rule, man. Keep scoring big goals against Chelsea and you might win the Most Valuable Dude trophy at the end of the year. Great job guys.

I would talk about the Gold Cup, but who gives a shit. Aside from Stuart Holden, the US B and C teams looked pretty weak. Enjoy the win Mexico, because they're coming back for ya with the big dawgs. w00f w00f.

August 12th, in Mexico City at Azteca Stadium, Mexico will finally lose to the USA in Mexico. I'm viewing the performance of the US team in this game as the measuring stick for how far the US has come this summer. Are we still going to be unoraganize and pathetic for the first 15 minutes of each half? Are we still going to play like a bunch of 10 year olds that just got dropped off by their mom at practice when they play outside the US? Hopefully, you've all matured enough as a team and individual players to make all of us at Dudes Punching Dudes proud. Kick some ass, dudes.

-
CeejEnjine

Jump Off Rocks into Cold as Fuck Water

The last two days have involved DPD trips to Santa Rosa, NM to get my stupidly awesome RV. I wish I had a grandma in Santa Rosa. It's such an ill little New Mexican town. Its also home to my favorite place in NM, The Blue Hole. You can read the wikipedia entry on it, or you can just know that its a deep as shit hole in the ground with some cold as fuck water in it. You jump off of rocks into it. It's the only way.

Point being, we have a fuckin RV and a Blue Hole 2 hours away. Sign up for our next outing to The Blue Hole today! We're going on Thursday.

Here's some pictures, fuckers.

The view from the "David Maron Memorial Jump"

Fat kid approved! What are you waiting for? Sign up today!

In an Age Without Heroes...

Its good to know we still got Bowie.

What the fuck is punk rock?

Ok, so a friend got wasted. He ran around and punched dudes like we all did. Why does the youngest out of us gotta be taken aside and yelled at? Come on. Everyone that faults an Armani for the short show at a Taylair is a fool. A fool and half, I say. We all had a great time and I still am mind boggled by why a dude would stop playing, point out a dude who was moshing at a punk rock show in a small space and make him feel like he was fucking up. THAT SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA! Lets make punk rock shows an elitist thing! Lets all act like Ian fucking Biggly and his crew of moshbots! Srrsly, lets all point fingers at friends we've known for an age and make them feel awful for getting slightly more drunk than you were.



CeejEngine, Armani Punk Rock Coalition.

The Last Vegan Wednesday @ Christines'.......

that's just the way it goes... i hope she gets a new place that we can continue to do things like this. also, if you're reading this and have a place to invite a bunch of drunx you should step up to the plate and learn how to cook and have fun. well, in memorial in this night i'm going to get piss drunk with some good friends and have some great laughs. the realness!

-AssJoose

p.s. christine, i haven't forgotten to finish your tattoo.

Kickball!

fuck that! not to say that it's not funny or anything, kicking the shit out of circular objects is great, however, if you want to kick a ball get one less bouncy, and size 5. if haven't got yet i'm talking about futbol. it's great, and we all realized that we smoke too much... and drink too much... or not enough. i digress: to get to the point D.P.D didn't do to well this game. it was a tied game (2-2) and ceej engine comes running in to make the winning goal then stone wall myles blocks it with is finger tips! what bull shit. if he had made that he would have ripped all our shirts off, oh well.

oh, so we're also going to start a drunk punk soccer league for random nights and sundays. find us and play.

-AssJoose

Meet the Dudes who Punch Dudes!

If you don't know, now ya know

Name: Resin and Coffee aka Armani
Duties: Making pots of coffee, working at Cliffs, scraping the shit out of every pipe
Quote: "If we get pulled over, I'm 12 and this thing is full of MicroMachines"
Armani is looked up to by all DuDads

Name: AssJoose aka AJ
Duties: Being pretentious, stick and poke tattoos, waking up drunk
Quote: "I WIN!"
AJ punches dudes and asks no quarter in return.

Name: Rom-err-oh aka Chris
Duties: Extreme Bocce Ball, Waking up at 1 in the afternoon, Buying weed with checks
Quote: "Ya caught me."
Chris Rom-err-oh's come from a strong family of party dudes. They are known to not fuck around.

Name: Furious sMyles aka Myles
Duties: Finding weed, down to do anything, getting sloshed and drumming
Quote: "I don't give a fuck."
Myles comes from the Westside. Don't let that fool ya.

Name: Pickett. The steamed one.
Duties: Showing up at inappropriate hours, waking up when he smells weed, drinking gin and punching girls.
Quote: "Who the fuck ate my Wheat Thins!!!"
Picketts are not to be trifled with. And don't even think about eating their fucking Wheat Thins.

Name:Ceej Engine AKA C.J.
Duties: finding the ragers, bad ideas, Polythythms
Quote: "get the fuck out of my room"
i mean she was really hot...


There are more Dudes that Punch Dudes, but we only had time for these fuckers.
Get with it. Burn stuff down this summer.